[Porn Week] Watching Porn in Groups

2 girls one cup“, “1 guy 1 cup and eel soup” – These are some of my favourite porn videos.

If you are unaware of what any of the above are then I strongly suggest that at this point you go to the internet and find them, for all of you porn aficionados this should not prove too taxing.

For those of you who have either done the relevant research or who were already aware of those videos then you are probably thinking that I have an interest in sadomasochism or scatophilia. This could not be further from the truth.

Like most others, I am barely able to sit through the videos that I have mentioned above. They are sick and disturbing. However the joy that these videos bring to me comes from when I show them to an unsuspecting friend or acquaintance. The shock value that they contain is superb. The horror that comes across someone’s face really does amuse me.

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You might say I have a ‘playful’ sense of humour.

However, the point I want to make is that it is completely unacceptable to watch these types of porn videos on your own.

If you watch these types of videos on your own, you are a disgusting individual, sick in the mind. I have not qualms about saying that as the content is truly disturbing. Watching these videos on your own really does mean that you take pleasure from some of the most disgusting acts I have ever heard of and you are sick.

However, watching these videos in a group is a perfectly acceptable and normal thing to do and I fully encourage it.

Is it always acceptable to watch porn in groups? The short answer is ‘no’ and I draw from my own experiences in making this statement. As an adolescent I recall watching a pornographic video that a friend had taken from his father’s collection. There were 6 of us who watched the video at 2am once this person’s father had gone to bed. The video is what I would call regular porn – 2 guys, 2 girls and a pool table (no cues).

The atmosphere in the lounge was initially rather jovial but quickly it became awkward as the porn started to heat up. Suddenly, the 6 people in that room were rather uncomfortable in the way they were sitting, some even needed to put a pillow in their lap to ease their ‘discomfort’.

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I recall one member of the group making some vague excuse about tiredness and left to go home (walking rather gingerly). I think it is safe to say that he did not go straight to sleep when he got home. For those of us who remained, no words were spoken, no one dared look anyone else in the eye and as such the video did not get turned off until it reached the climax. With the jovial atmosphere dead and buried, all that remained was awkwardness and uncomfortable seating arrangements – a truly horrific experience.

There is a time and a place for ‘regular’ porn. But it’s safe to say that your friend’s father’s lounge, at 2 in the morning, with 5 friends, is not the appropriate forum. And it is not something that I have or indeed intend to repeat ever again.

Note to readers: If you get a chance look up any japping video, I think you’ll enjoy it!

Curator’s note: Gavin Simpson is British. This explains why he is a sick man. He is also a Barrister-at-Law and member of the Honourable Society of the Inner Temple.

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Posted on 19 May 2011. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0.

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3 Responses to [Porn Week] Watching Porn in Groups

  1. kate

    u just described a 'rite of passage' in almost every teen's life, man. some managed to go home okay n some got busted by the parents…. aaah good times! keep writing, pls.

  2. Gavin Simpson

    Hi Johnny, thaks for the question. I would say that the article was supposed to be amusing, not laugh out loud funny but a bit of fun. I think you would agree that it is quite tounge-in-cheek.

    As an aside Boomtang is a curious name, I believe that the urban dictionary defines it as a general word to describe someting that is good, is it really your name or was that a subtle compliment of my article?

    Thanks for the support champ!

  3. John Boomtang

    Was this supposed to be funny?